Breathe. Just breathe.

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Anna Nalick's song, Breathe (2a.m.), has been running through my head this week.

Especially the chorus:

'Cause you can't jump the track, we're like cars on a cable
And life's like an hourglass, glued to the table,
No one can find the rewind button, girl
Just cradle your head in your hand
And breathe, just breathe
Oh breathe, just breathe.
It's one of those weeks (months, years).

The more time I spend outside, the better I feel.
Sunshine warms the skin and the heart.
Frozen, clear air helps me to focus my thoughts and prioritize.

Working to keep ahead of the rolling boulders,
Attempting to be proactive,
Keeping my ears open and mouth closed.

Reminding myself that I am human.
Remembering to breathe.
Just breathe.

Spinning head = motivation

Oldest daughter is trying to make her college decision before the end of 2013.  She wants to put this huge, adult decision -- one that weighs on her heavily -- behind her so she can actually enjoy the remainder of senior year.

As we walked the first of the two final candidate campuses this weekend, I let the senior daughter walk ahead with her friend, taking in all the sights and information.  I lagged behind with my sophomore daughter.

We have focused much time and energy on my youngest daughter, helping her to be a confident person and student.  She has quite the "staff" at school (as we joke, but it's true) to help her be successful.  She dreams of nursing, or helping people in some way.  We dream that she will have independent academic and social skills to be able to study at a 4-year university, perhaps even far from home.

It's November, so it's prime time for me to be stressed and preoccupied.  I wasn't talking much during our campus walk.  Youngest daughter can talk about anything and everything, filling any dead air around (yes, she did inherit this skill from me!)

As we crunched the leaves on the path, youngest started to tell me how she plans to study nursing and dance at a medium or large school.  The conversation was fast-paced and all over the place.  She wants to have our trust that she will do her best.  She wants there to be lots of clubs and people going to football games.  She knows that the people at the disability office have to give her help. (I reminded her that she needs to seek accommodations). She also plans to make lots of friends and eat at all the different cafeterias and have a cool dorm room with lights.

Is your head spinning?  Mine was.  Her head was spinning, but her mixed up thoughts have turned into a spurt of motivation.

Yesterday we saw a campus that her sister liked, but youngest adored.  She begged for a sweatshirt.  "I can go here. This can be my college.  I need to do my work and focus in high school. College starts now," she explained.

Someone's highly motivated.  I'll take it!

Best friend

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Yesterday was my best friend's birthday.  Beth is the kind of friend that everyone needs in their life!

We met when we were four years old.  We lived on the same street, but I had to get across the street and walk past a few houses to get to her house.  Kindergarten was with Mrs. Maki.  We got to play "house", sing songs, and celebrate graduation with a pinata!

Our moms started a Brownie troop for us and many other girls.  We had great times playing with Barbies, riding bikes, and spending long hours on the swing set.  At the end of 4th grade, her parents found a new house in a town a few minutes away.  My parents were looking for a new house that spring, too.  The universe wanted us together... our parents (unknowingly) bought houses four lots away from each other on the same street!

Throughout the years, we've been very close, traveled in different circles, had a variety of other friends and interests.  This hasn't stopped us from picking right back up where we left off, every time we talk.

Beth is caring, kind and selfless.  She's organized, thoughtful, and gives you just enough of a push to get you going when you're stuck.  She can handle the most stressful situation with ease and poise.  You may think she's a pushover, but she's far from it!

Happy birthday to my best friend, 40 years and counting!  Thanks for always being there for me and my family.  You are a treasure!

The Dinner Dilemma

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It's hard to be married to a man who is a great cook and also loves to eat out.

Our kids definitely have opinions on what makes a great dinner:

• caesar salad
• beef tenderloin
• baked potato with everything
• sweet dessert

I'm lucky to remember to defrost some meat from the freezer and toss it into the crock pot with a can of condensed cream-of-something soup and some spices.

I'm not the person in the family who should be shopping, planning and preparing dinner.

The person who should works out of town 3-4 days per week.  When he gets home, cooking is the last thing on his list, even though he's been hanging in a town where the "fine dining" is Olive Garden.

Another force working against me ... the oldest teen has a job at a grocery store.  She spends hours checking out her favorite foods and snacks, taking mental notes about what we groceries we should have in the house.

What's a mom to do?  I'm capable of cooking with spices, creating rues from soups and sauces.  I know how to handle a meat thermometer, my oven and the grill.

I turned to Pinterest this year.

My cooking has not improved.  It's become more unexpected and experimental.

Maybe I'll make a list of some go-to dinners that the family likes and enjoys - (hahhahhahah) I wonder how many meals will be on this list.  Maybe I'll precook meals and keep them in the freezer.  Maybe I'll inspire my girls to take over dinner duty once in a while.

Then again, I may just stick to my favorite meal.  Eating out!

Building relationships

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Last year, I worked with a group of 4th and 5th graders, all afternoon, in an intensive reading intervention program.  By May, the kids were exhausted, I was jumping out of my mind with stress.  There was no time to talk about books, and very little time to connect. We had to stay on task, work well in a group of eight, and push through.  We weren't having any fun.  At all.

This year, I have three of those students (now 5th graders) in a small group.  I started out the year excited to see them... forgetting how tough the end of last year was.  I let them know that I had picked them specifically to work with me - we would be working with a new intervention program, and we were going to be talking about books....ALL THE TIME.

I talked with them about writing about books in a journal.  They decided that each of them would pick a day to write:  Mon, Weds, Fri.  They were good about it the first week (especially after I gifted them a beautiful - yet inexpensive - new journal), and they are working to get back in the habit.

The girls are really trying their best when they come.  I am being patient and helpful.  I'm modeling and asking more questions.  I give them time to discuss what they are thinking while we read.  Some of our small but significant successes:

• S has finished!!! reading THREE graphic novels (this is the same girl who announced "I don't like books" - while B gasped in horror - during our first meeting).
• S has encouraged T and B to also read graphic novels (Babymouse and Smile top the list)
• B has reminded S that we all need a turn to talk.  She is the model for waiting and not interrupting.
• T is carrying many books (old habits die hard), but she is concentrating on reading Double Fudge and working hard to understand the story.
• T is our lead note-taker. She understands how to find evidence in the text.  She helps S and B do the same in a kind way.

Today I was given a chocolate bar from S.  It even had a little bow.  I profusely thanked her.  Later, I wrote a thank you note to each of the girls, pointing out how they've been working hard and contributing to our small group discussions on books.

Does every day roll smoothly with these girls?  Nope.  Do we all want to accomplish the same thing?  Yes.  They know they are off to junior high next year, and there's not much time to become more confident and proficient readers.

I'm happy to help.

Trying to contain the chaos

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I know, I know.

It's always been part of my life.

I bring it on myself. I claim that I can't find time to organize.

Well... that's not true.  I have the time, but

I do other (more fun!) things instead.

But then it starts to get to me.

CHAOS:  In the classroom

• student materials in need of reorganizing (did take care of that today)
• library ... half at home, most on shelves, most labeled, not quite in boxes... barely even touched
• papers for a binder laying on top of the binder

CHAOS:  At home

• the drawer full of bills and papers to be filed
• the socks that need pairing and rolling 
• the pile of sheets pulled from beds on Thursday

Since we survived a crazy homecoming week with two teenage girls,

I'll take every drop of sympathy I can get this week....

(can you hear the violin music in the background?)

• "You need more sleep!"
• "It's not that bad!"
• "You've had a lot going on!"
• "Do you feel okay?  You seem out of it."

Maybe after a cold beverage, a funny sitcom, a soak in the tub and a full night of sleep....

I'll feel a little better

Less whiny 

and more 

motivated

to clear a little bit of the chaos.

The Book Talk Tuesday Phenomenon

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It's Tuesday!!

What's so great about Tuesdays at my school?

It's BOOK TALK TUESDAY!

This calls for a t-shirt with some reading celebrities!

Wonder Shirts

Then I meet Michelle (friend! colleague! best reading teacher!) at the computer lab for our school wide television broadcast.  One of us has written a script, but we usually don't practice.  (We love to ad lib... it's funnier for the other adults watching!)

"It's Book Talk Tuesday," announces one of our 5th grade anchors.
"I wonder what reading tip we'll learn today," muses the other anchor.

We've talked up books, BIG TIME, this year:

• we discussed finding a good fit book
• we talked about the SHINY Newbery and Caldecott medals
• we shared how fun it is to READ a book (we read "It's a Book" by Lane Smith)
• we've interviewed other teachers about their reading (thanks, Karen!)

On Tuesdays, when kids from all over the building (even the littlest bilingual kindergartners) see us in the hallway, their eyes light up.

"I saw you on the TV!"

"I like your shirt!"

"It's BOOK TALK TUESDAY!"

When we talked about the SHINY Caldecott and Newbery medals that adorn many books in our library, we added a little sparkle of sound... a little riff on the xylophone (psst... Michelle - that was brilliant!).  After school, I was standing across the room from three 5th graders.  One called my name.  As I looked over, the three of them mimicked playing the xylophone and in unison exclaimed, "SHINY!"

I have to admit, this Book Talk Tuesday bit is the highlight of my week.  Yes, we plan to get students on board and share their books, but right now I'm enjoying the conversations we are creating throughout the school.  Classroom teachers are using our BTT topics as a springboard for more book conversations in their classrooms.  We've built a bulletin board to track our topics.

All this... and we're just talking books.

I love it!

*****

P.S. Michelle talked about BTT on her blog back in September.  Enjoy her post here.